This is getting Ridiculous

I have long known that I am an equal opportunist and often wish to be a guy.

 

But really subconscious,

Was it that necessary to shove me in a dream where I was busy making out with Megan Fox and a friend who shall remain unnamed? Do you really have to equip me with something extra in those dreams? Why the hell can’t I just have normal dreams in which I am a girl and there is a boy?

 

I can only recount twice that I’ve dreamed myself a girl with a guy. Okay, three times. Most of the time if I dream that I’m with someone, I dream myself as a guy.

 

A short adorable cute effeminate guy. Sometimes with men, sometimes with women.

 

I don’t even know if that counts as a hetero dream. I’m a girl, dreaming I’m a guy, who has a girlfriend. That’s pretty lesbian if you ask me. I’ll refrain from recounting the stranger aspects of my perverted dreams but let it be known, the amount of disturbingly homosexual overtones in them make me question my sexuality and gender identity.

 

Can we stop shoving the fact that I’m not allowed to have sex with girls in my face?

 

Can we please dream up some hawt boy action? You know, so I can actually look my girlfriends in the eye and not flashback to the part in my subconscious that is busy making out with her?

 

Yeah, thanks a lot subconscious.

I really need those really hawt images of Megan Fox in my brain during class.

 

Right. Shutting Up now.